Uncouth PerspectivesNot on the rug, man.

This noise deafens my ears. A lot of wind makes noise as it escapes from the mouths of many people, yet I hear little of meaning.

Have you forgotten your ideals? Did you have any in the first place? Will you ever have any?

Or will you change your opinion and your “beliefs” with the passing tide of popularity?

We have seen a great many things, in America, and in the world, over the last couple of weeks. We have seen deadly tragedy. We have seen brave heroism. We have seen a patriotic country. We have seen a bigotted people. We have seen many things, but what really gets to me, is we have turned a blind eye to the bad things that have reared their head.

I do not want to lighten the wonders that have shown. A people coming together. The sad deaths of thousands. The bravery and consolidation of many people.

We have singled out a people, and even our citizens are not safe from that wrath. We have swayed to patriotism. But, for what reasons? Is it because we love America… or because it’s the thing to do to not get beat up? Is it because we love all our people… or because we’re pissed off?

All I ask is this–

Know your beliefs.

Know why you believe them.

And know why you live.

Because, my friends, that’s all we really have. And we lose even that, in the end.

Today’s rant, sadly, will be much less rant then more simple commentary. For those of you who have been following myself and Uncouth.net, I apologize for our absence. Whatever weird illness befell me attacked both mentally and physically and I was just unwilling and unable to work on the website. The happenings of September 11, 2001 had little to play in the lack of updates, and I am actually a little saddened that I did not add my voice to the throngs of others.

I would like to thank everyone who continued to visit the site and continued to write in the forums. I still hope to see the forums grow largely, and this is only the begining.

In continuation of the website, as soon as I get moved and settled, I will be hosting a radio show and feature a weekly article on www.freethoughtradio.com. Please check out the website, it has much to offer, and I think most everyone will be able to appreciate it.

“What of the crisis/tragedy/etc?!”

I want to say this, and simply this:

I am saddened by the loss of life. I am saddened that to get a message across, someone felt they needed to kill. I am saddened that to bring a country and, possibly, a world together we needed death. I do not support America any more or less because of the happenings. I love America. I also think it has many problems. I do not stand just American, I stand of humanity. I do not stand just for those killed, I stand for every individual killed in plight, jest, or whatever ruthless cause they stumbled into. We need to learn to live, rather than to die. We need to learn to listen, rather than to talk. We need to learn to work together, rather than kill together.

I have many things to rant about. Some of them of uber-importance. Some of them may seem trivial and meaningless.

All of them are from my mind and my heart.

And all of them mean something.

Do your words mean something?

For those of you who don’t know, mods are user-created add-ons for (typically) commercial video games. Game companies support these because they lengthen the life-span and increase the value of their games.

The article addressed the fact that these mods were often very violent and, more importantly, often created by kids. Various parent groups were trying to put the lid on them, etc, etc, etc�we all know this drill.

Initially, I didn’t think much of it. Parent groups have been tooting their horns about every little piece of skin shown lately, be it barely hid by lacy clothing or sprayed against the wall.

The more I thought about it, the more it upset me. There are some very key issues here that need to be looked at:

1. Making these mods is no small task. They take weeks and months of work with some rather high- level programming and graphics work. If my 16 year old son were able to create some of the mods I’ve played that were created by other 16 year olds, I would be very, very proud of him. It takes a special kind of dedication (almost zero user mods ever make money) and skill set to make a working mod. This kind of ability and initiative should not be dissuaded.

2. Who the hell are these groups to tell me what’s good and not good for my children? If I want to know what my kids are playing, I’ll find out. If I don’t like it, I won’t let them. Don’t put computers in their room if you’re that scared of what they’ll come across. The problem is so many of today’s parents are letting their kids be raised by the television and internet. This is a real shame, but that doesn’t mean the rest of us have to make sure it’s squeaky clean.

3. (Insert censorship argument here. [You know the drill])

At one point in the article David Walsh was quoted as saying underage mod makers are the “moral equivalent of child pornographers.” I can hardly think of a worse insult and slap in the face to the extremely talented and intelligent teenagers who make these mods.

I’ve been playing violent games since I was 5 years old. I’ve probably killed hundreds of thousands of computer-generated opponents and gotten big ol’ chuckles at all the blood I’ve slopped across the walls. My real life body count, I’m proud to say, is still zero.

I may seem distracted and disassociated because I spent most of my weekend fighting with my computer to get it to record sounds (which it still hasn’t done well), I threw away my rent money orders (I have NO idea what I’m going to do now), and I had a horrible time sleeping. So, enjoy. Heh.

I went to a barbeque yesterday, and it was very nice. It was also very interesting, because I do not normally hang out with the people I was with aside from quiet social interactions (such as one of the guys and I are working on a screenplay and we’re working on individual books that we help each other out with). This was a group of people who partied, go to raves, all kinds of things. The barbeque was nice, though, because it was a quiet gathering. We ate food, we went in the pool, and it was all around just entertaining.

I thought it was really nice that everyone was extremely gracious to the family who was hosting the event. It was at one of my friend’s house and his family decided to throw it, because he is leaving for spain. And his family is amazing. They are friendly, opening, warm, and enjoyed doing what they did. And all of the people were very respectful of that. It was interesting for me to see people who would be labeled and tagged by hypocrites and more to be trouble makers and “rude people” to be nice, thankful, and appreciative. It made me feel good about people, it made me feel good about my friends, it made me feel good about my beliefs.

Who you are is not in your appearance, it is not in your clothing, it is not in your hair style, it is not in anything but who you are.

This was proven again to my yesterday. This is proven again to me everyday.

How often is it proven to you? And how often do you actually see it?

Supposedly, we are a very religious society, one that is based on an altruist doctrine of helping your neighbor and kindest to all. But, we very, very rarely actually practice this.

It is not a bad thing that we do not practice this, but it is bad that we claim to believe this and then do not practice it. It is not a real belief if we do not practice it. Most people profess a belief that they do not practice or hold, because they want to be “good people.” It comes back to self worth.

It is sad to think how many people try to force themselves to believe something other than what they really believe. They are trying so hard to be good people, to accepted people, that they do not take a moment for themselves to stop and live. For most, self worth is reflected in others. If you look and act good, then you must be good. And then you can go home and delve into whatever dirty pleasures you might have.

I seem to be rambling a bit, so let me go into a story.

Yaay.

Saturday night, I was driving home from hanging out with some friends late into the night. It was about an hour long drive, and I got back to my area around 5 am. When I was exiting the freeway, I saw a car stopped semi-perpendicular in the lane, with emergency flashers on and the hood up. Being me, I pulled over to see if they needed some help. And they did.

As I was working to help them, two younger women, out (by the way, I have limited knowledge on cars… and I found out, even less at 5am after a long night and a lot of driving, heh… I found out that 10 people had stopped, rolled down their window and asked

“Hey, are you allright?”

“No, we’re not… we need some help.”

The stopped person would look kind of surprised, mumble something about not being able to help them, and drive off.

Wow.

So, they had not really intended to stop and help. They just wanted to make it look like they did (or, maybe, just get news and stick their nose in.. but not actually do anything). Most likely, they drove home, crawled into bed, and said “Hey, look at what a great person I am. I stopped to make sure they were okay.”

Here is the bottom line:

Your self worth is not affected, truly, by how you look to others. It’s an empty feeling and eventually, you’ll stack enough of it on to equal nothing. Do not try to look good for others… be good for yourself.

If you are going to stop and ask if someone needs help, be prepared to help! If you cannot help, then do not waste anyone’s time.