Working out is often a very personal thing.  Trust me, I understand this.  Getting myself to a place where I can workout on a regular basis has been a very long, uphill battle.  Not only was I incredibly socially awkward in middle and high school, but I (gladly, at the time) was able to get out of taking P.E.  I have cocked ankles and “pes planus” (flat feet).  At the time it made a lot of sense–I could have seriously hurt myself.  Knowing what I know now, though, and spending a lot of time doing things like hiking, running, playing racquetball, and foot hockey, I realize what a disservice not getting to do P.E. was.  Who knows, maybe not doing it then allowed me to do it now?

Whatever good or bad decision it was, one consequence is I never learned how to work out.  This is not just an issue about discipline, but even knowing how to lift weights, run right, hydrate, all of those things.  When I first started working with upper body weights, I hurt myself easy and often because my back and shoulder muscles had zero support–and not just core, but a lot of the muscles were just never used in things like marathon reading.

So when I say working out is a personal thing, I mean for many it takes incredible concentration.  Ironically, though, it took having people to go with to motivate me.  I know it is this way for others, but for me it had to do a lot with things like not knowing or understanding even how gyms or locker rooms worked out.  My last experiences in early public school with working out before I stopped doing P.E. were humiliating because I was so clumsy and so weak that I could hardly participate in events… and young boys are hardly understanding.

Thankfully, all of that is in the past and I’m much more fit and I’ve found a real passion for getting physical.  Which allows me to be observant as I work out now.  I have noticed that people behave differently at the two facilities.  Maybe because at the big gym there are a lot of students, but it is clearly more social there.  But even I’m this way when I go with my friends to work out.  Is it the space?  Is it the setting?  People are still focused, but it just feels more loose.

The rare time I run into someone in my complex, there always seems to be some kind of tension.  Maybe there is some sort of small workout etiquette I am just not aware of.  Maybe a lot of people who like the workout room like it because it is private–I can totally get that.  I just find it weird that two people can be in a room and hardly even say hello.  But I guess that is how it goes.  So many people don’t even say hello to their neighbors–funny how the closer the dwellings are, the less likely it seems people try to form community.  Especially in a pseudo-urban “young working professional” type place like where I live.

Really, though, I find the gym to be a nice tool.  It helps me get in shape and get the workout I need, but I try to spend my time doing other physical things as much as I can, especially if they are social.  If you can get community + fitness together, that’s an even bigger win to me.

The tumultuous economy has affected many.  For a while I thought I might be untouched, but things are looking a lot more shaky than they were.  This affects me in very interesting ways.  Most of the problem is not actually my personal situation, though it is scary.  Mostly, people are just a lot more grumpy and cynical.  It wears.

Where I have been most affected is my plan to finally finish my Master’s degree in Religious Studies.  I finally got myself ramped back up to get it finished and now with pay cuts and bleak times ahead, I just can’t justify taking on the loans I now need to take on to get it finished.  I’ve paid for my school as I’ve gone along and taking on debt is just not appealing right now.

A good friend told me that I didn’t need an advanced degree to be legitimate.  While I’m not trying to get my Master’s in Religious Studies to legitimize anything–I’m doing it because I want the knowledge and the experience–it got the meat juices flowing.  Unless there is specific knowledge you are trying to get, degrees are mostly part of myth–a right of passage myth.  By going through the steps and the process, you prove you can participate in the process of advancing in society.  Note that I am not saying the degree process is false or wrong, but there is a mythical element to it.  While our educations provide foundations, it is our experience and our ability to learn from that experience that generates the bulk of our knowledge.

How many people define themselves by the degrees they have?  Or, more to what I’ve been thinking about, how many people look down at themselves because they don’t have degree X.  Or aren’t doing Y and so failure is the only thing in sight.

We all have an idea of who we are and who we want to be.  There is going to be a natural difference between who we think we are and who we are (in sum of our experiences).  It’s often too easy to overlook a bad deed or a poorly worded retort.  Let’s face it, it can be awful hard to admit “Wow, I really screwed that up and was not very nice.”  Most of us seem to learn to apologize, but I’m too aware of how many people seem to not understand there is a difference between just saying the words and meaning them.

I’m curious what happens when we let these ideas of who are or who we want to be get to mythical proportions.  It seems like it would be too easy to swing into grossly arrogant or pitifully depressed.

I know this happens to me, for example, when I think about past relationships or where I think I should be right now in my life with romance.  I always assumed that I would get married (once) and have a rich and happy partnership.  I feel like I have a lot to offer.  People around me like to be supportive and tell me what a great husband/father/potato I would make–I want to scream at them to stop saying that, because it just makes me feel worse about it all.

I’ve learned a lot about myself and how to be a good partner through the failed relationships I’ve had a long the way–and that’s also not sailing they are all failures just because they ended… but I’ve definitely had some failures.  But a lesson I am coming to see is how I struggle with myself because of the dichotomy of how I see myself versus how I really am.

But it’s not just pining about relationships.  Romance is just an easy go-to.  I think this happens with all kinds of things:  education, careers, personal achievement goals, whatever.  It’s important to have something to strive for.. and it’s incredibly important to hope.  But it’s also important to remember what those things are and not get so caught up that we forget either who we are or what we are doing.  Sometimes it’s good to just be yourself.  Sometimes it’s good to just enjoy the journey.

Ah, but the truth is, it’s always good to dream.

I have some good friends who are very important to me and who I definitely do not spend enough time with. When I talk about community, I do not talk about individual friendships or groups of friends and associates. I am talking about being a part of something bigger than oneself–about having a network of people to invest in, to lean on, and to support. I’ve tried to find groups who share passions that I do: atheists, hockey fans/players, readers, etc… While I’ve met good people and even found groups to be a part of, I’ve never felt like I belong.

Some of that I attribute to my childhood. Until I got into the middle of my freshman year of high school, I moved every year or two–three times I moved states. Each time, I had to give up everything I knew–everyone I knew–and start over. I look at pride with being able to be self-sufficient and to find the strength I need to get through in myself, but I often wonder what it would be like to feel part of something bigger.

The other side of the coin, though, is that community often includes necessary exclusion–by definition, there are outsiders. Sometimes this is nominal and sometimes it is highly marginalizing. I have joked about this before, but I really do feel marginalized sometimes. A big issue is religion–not believing in God (and the lack of belief being important to me) makes me quite a pariah–and not being militant about it makes me feel distant from many, if not most, atheists.

There is something about atheism which breeds militancy. Someone very important to me recently said, on an unrelated but similar topic, “I don’t want to spend my life on the defensive.” I think that feeling plays into it–what better defense than an offense? I know I went through a period of militancy, but I just felt empty and hollow–I don’t hate religion, I don’t hate people who believe in God. I do hate ignorant group-think. I do hate blind thinking and perception. I do hate intolerance. But none of these are unique to religion or adherents.

Intolerance is something which can come along with community, especially community with boundaries of righteousness. And the greatest irony is that the stronger the walls that a community builds, the more they are at risk from isolating themselves from society, which in turns causes inward focus on the community, which in turn builds stronger walls…

One of the areas of religion I have studied is cults and one of the characteristics which people first identity as “cultish” is strong isolation. Give up your family, your friends, your past–they are tainted, we have the answer. That sort of stuff. But people are too heavy handed with their use of the word cult. It is, important I think, to understand how any strong community risks breeding this sentiment, especially from outsiders. The challenge is finding a way to balance community and interaction with the greater society.

I know I want to feel a part of a greater community–like I belong. But the honest truth is that I will never, ever give up my ability or interest in judging a person on his/her individual merit for a sense of belonging. I would rather be entirely alone and honest with myself and my relationships with others. I will never be a part of something which draws lines and says “you are in or you are out.” Those of you who know me or have been reading my writing for long enough know that among the top of my frustrations is either/or ideas. If my options are “all or nothing” then there is a serious problem with my options.

And so, the children of the revolution were faced with the age-old problem: it wasn’t that you had the wrong kind of government, which was obvious, but that you had the wrong kind of people.

Night Watch, Terry Pratchett

I joined a group dedicated to exchanging goods for free.

Here is the basic premise: I have something which I no longer want, but is not actually garbage; I just don’t want it. Instead of throwing it away, I offer it for free. Perhaps, down the road, someone offers something else up I might I need.

Pretty neat idea. A lot of things which are thrown away could go to good use somewhere else. I whole-heartedly believe in this idea and I want to do more to support the reduction of waste and the reuse of goods, especially things like furniture.

However, I am constantly aware of the greed in the hearts of people. In this particular group, there is a third option, which, in and of itself, is not problematic. You can also put up notices of things you want. Let’s say you’re trying to put together a small children’s library in your house: hey, anyone have some kid’s books laying around anymore which you don’t need? Yeah, I support that.

But what about just blatant gimme gimmes? I have not been a member of the group long and already I have seen some absurd requests, such as a car, an air conditioner, a go-kart, a washer or dryer, a beach cruiser, a ping-pong table, a queen sized bed, bmx gear, or even a drum kit… and more.

I’m honestly torn on this. It should be okay for members of a community like this to ask for things they need, even if it is totally selfish, but reading these… it just come across as dirty. Maybe I’m reading my own biases into it, but I feel that there is a blatant disregard for the idea. I’m not making a scientific effort out of it to see if people who are asking for things are also giving them up and I’ve certainly not been a member of the group long enough to make that determination, but from the tone of some of the requests, I just cannot believe it.

And that’s what it is really about. Children’s books versus a drum kit. I suppose people have these things laying around and a little prodding never hurts, but you think that being part of a community where people give things away freely–they’d probably be giving them away already.

I guess I was just taken by surprise because I expected to find a community of sharing, of giving, not a community of taking.

I do not like giving them on prescribed days.

At least, I do not like giving them on prescribed days for the sheer sake of the day. There is the obvious reason–the gross commercialism. Do I really need to rehash that obvious and tired (though not any less true) argument? There’s also something kind of dirty about the expectation. It is one thing for a person to know they are getting a gift and being excited. But it’s an entirely different thing when someone assumes, if not demands, a gift for no good reason but tradition says to do it–and it goes from dirty to disgusting if they get mad when you do not give them something.

But, now, giving a gift because you want to give a gift. That’s awesome. Or giving a gift because someone has done something and you want to tell them thanks, or how much you appreciate it, or whatever, that is cool. Or telling someone you’ve gotten them a gift and watching them squirm with anticipation… priceless.

I have talked about this before, but one of the things I do not understand is the idea that if someone gives you a gift, you must reciprocate. There is this kind of spiral of guilt that can begin with a single gift. In my EVER so humble opinion, real gifts do not require reciprocation. If the receiver wants to reciprocate, have a blast. But, again, it’s the expectation where things become problematic.

Although, I can imagine that if I wanted to create waves of havoc, I could start a gift reciprocation circle of DOOM. Here’s how it works. I give three or four people small trinkets. They respond with something better because, obviously, if you’re going to reciprocate, you must also better the person (nothing like a competition when giving gifts). Then I take the gifts I get back and give them to the other people. Maybe find three or four other people to give small gifts too. Then I just keep swapping back and forth until someone gives me a private island with a lemur and a turtle on it.

“Perhaps I am still asleep and this is some horrible dream where I think I am awake, but I’m really deeply asleep. If I am not careful, I will enter a cycle of fantasy life, endlessly confused, caught in a whirlwind of abnormality, desperately seeking an unknown goal which would, of course, be waking up to normalcy.”

Of course, as my eyes unwillingly opened, I had somewhat of a shocking epiphany–this was normalcy. Not that I have any problem with normalcy… except when it’s most present as my alarm clock glaring in the early hours, feeling as intruded upon to be gazed at by anyone at such an awful hour as I did to be doing any kind of gazing. My next thought was to be angry:

“Damn you cruel world! I nestled in twilight’s bosom for protection, comfort, and slumber, and I am tossed away like an orphaned child, crying into the night!”

Okay, perhaps that is a bit of an embellishment. I was definitely cranky, though. I rarely wake up in the middle of the night but every time I do (especially if I cannot find good cause), I feel betrayed by something between my body and my brain.

My brain, cunning creature that it is, took a long hard look at my body. This whole sleeping and waking thing, it seems so biological… that just reeks of the body being at fault.

Thoughts, my body counters, You woke up thinking.

In the end, I take the logical choice that it is a grand conspiracy between the two and I will never know the truth, but my yet-to-be-born great-grand children will once they’ve unsealed the documents and deciphered the lies within.

Here’s to a glass of something warm and yummy for my tummy and another attempt slumber.

Good night and I hope you have slept better than me tonight!

Actually, I really helped a friend of a friend move today because I have only met the person I moved once before and that was last Monday.

Between being a fairly large (6’5″), “oh, he looks like he’d like to carry my solid oak desk by himself” person (of course the irony being I sit behind a computer all day) and the fact that I drove a truck for several years, I have moved a lot of people. I am not here to complain about moving people, though that might be different if I still had a truck (Note: someone with a truck does not automagically make them an interested moving service).

One of the things that moving day always highlights for me is how people utilize tools. Typically when you move, there is always at least a dolly or some other mechanical device designed to make moving things from point A to B easier. When you use them right. There is always an adventure when someone looks at something large and ungainly and says “You know, I bet we can put that on the dolly.” It’s been my experience that those words are definitely listed under “Famous Last Words.”

Sometimes it is just easier to carry the things. Yeah, while I made the crack about sitting behind a computer, I am a pretty big guy and carrying things is easier for me. For people who are injured or some other way disabled, I am with ya. But there’s a point when using tools, in this case perhaps a dolly, it becomes not only a crutch but is actually a hindrance.

Perhaps not quite similar, but it also reminds me of a busy parking lot. What I typically see is a lot of people running around in circles trying desperately to get a spot up front. Me, I just drive towards the back, find an easy space to park in and walk to where I am going. No stress, easy parking, and I get exercise so Nyaaaah!

It is way too easy for a tool to become a crutch. Just look at calculators (I’m guilty). But it is also easy for tools to become hindrances. Hopefully you’ve noted that I am not really talking just about moving here. One of the wonderful things about the human mind is our ability to create and use tools to our advantage. Laziness, however, is also one of our claims to genetic fame. And I think it is such a shame when people hold themselves back by trying to take the “easy” way which turns out to be a dead-end.

So, I didn’t shave the whole weekend I played hockey and I decided to play around with growing a full beard in. Mainly I wanted to see how much grey I had.

This is a conversation I was having with my friend
about it:

Me: There’s so much freaking grey in my coming-in beard.

Friend: Better for you. get the chicks easier.

Me: Yeah, cause you know the babes, they love beards.

Friend: young chicks do because it makes you look older

Me: Can I tell you something you don’t want to hear?

Friend: sure

Me: Porn is not demonstrative of how the world works.

Enjoy the pictures, because it is not going to stay.

For the most part, it is what I assumed. A lot of people, men and women, have very bland, shallow, and non-descriptive profiles. “Gosh, I’m just a down to earth [gender], who takes it easy and likes to have a good time! I’m looking for someone who is honest, funny, and no drama!” Tell me, really, who is not looking for these things? To me, that is one of the things that gets me every time I read this stuff. Do you really think it’s going to make a difference or, perhaps, net someone who you really want to meet?

The impression I get that people seem to go off the idea that pictures will sell everything. At least, that is the assumption I am making off of: 1) the lack of depth to profiles and 2) my cynical view of the unwashed masses. And I am sure that people go hunting profiles based off of this. Now, do not get me wrong. Physical attraction IS important–I mean, it is not really a relationship without that. But unless you really do want to just party and/or have sex, there really should be more to it than that

Trying to play devil’s advocate, the process of selling yourself like a piece of meat online is not necessarily comfortable or easy. If you commit to the process, you have to open yourself up a little bit (and, perhaps, have an understanding of yourself). And I think there can be a lot of better matching coming from something like that process . . . but so many people seem to move the club/bar/etc hook up to this arena and I think it shows. I do not think there is anything wrong with meeting people at the bar or club… I mean, it’s one reason to go to those places and, frankly, it is fun. But, at least from my perspective, meeting the “right” person in that setting takes a shit ton of luck.

Anyways, the thing that got me down this line of thought is that as I’ve read profiles, I have noticed a lot of women have added “good hygiene” to their list of qualities in the people they would like to meet.

Really?

And not really as in “you like hygiene?!” but really as in “you have to say that?” I really have to wonder what the guys out there are doing to make this an issue. It actually makes me wonder if I’ve got something going on I do not know about. I also wonder what this means. Is this like a “how often do you brush your teeth, ugh!” or a “could you shower after the game?” I play hockey and, honestly, that’s a gross sport. You sweat like crazy and you’ve got all kinds of padding to soak it up and keep it close to home for all time. I’m sure other sports are bad, too. But, yeah, I keep my stuff clean and I shower. Often.

It just really makes me wonder . . .

Okay. Let’s stop for a second.

Really? This is what is important?

When this “news” broke, it was the headline on most American news outlets. I was literally beat upside the head about it and I try to avoid “entertainment” news as much as I can, but this story seemed to be inescapable (and continues to be).

So a 16 year old girl got pregnant. Weeeeird. That never happens. Oh, wait, no, that’s right: it happens ALL the time. The shock and surprise is… really amazing. What I do not understand is what the shock is really about. I mean, is it because she a star? A “role” model? She meets the cookie cutter definition of attractive? Because her sister is falling apart and it is fun to watch the house continue to burn down?

It just makes me livid that it is such a big deal when it happens to this one person (they are talking about making a show about it already!). People need to open their eyes and wake up–our kids are having kids and the way we are dealing with it is only making it grow. We have a culture that has one part of it’s foundation in selling sex and another in repressing it. Kids are smart enough to realize how stupid the repression part is, too naive to understand the commercialization of sex, and rebellious enough not to listen by the time anyone starts talking to them (perhaps talking to them as a real person, too). A very fertile mix, it turns out.

With this and other such stories, I just get so angry when something which highlights the normal state of things happens and suddenly it’s a big deal–but instead of actually dealing with the problem, there is a knee jerk reaction to dealing with it which never works and no long term thinking happens. And, of course, it is then quickly forgotten. I already can not wait to be tired of seeing stories about how to deal with teenage pregnancy, and I already can not wait to be suddenly surprised when I stop seeing the stories.

I wrote this as an exercise in self exploration and have been butchering it to put in different profiles.  Enjoy: 

Does the turbulence ever upset you?

Life is a bumpy ride and I’m one cantankerous passenger.

I am thinker, leader, ranter, writer, actor. I am not interested in the status quo, I am interested in making things better. I struggle with the definition of normality, but what I know for sure that is it should not be complacency, laziness, or ignorance. I despise those who do not understand this. Individualism is being lost in a sea of selfish hedonism and the irony is almost too much to handle at times.

I have strong views which I enjoy sharing with anyone who will listen, but I do not believe on forcing those views on anyone. One of the best things in life is a good conversation. Or maybe a good debate. I am highly empathetic and other’s emotions can bowl me over like a steam roller. There are very few characteristics I appreciate more than a person who thinks.

I am not a fan of either/or, black/white type of thinking. I believe that one of the great things about life is the shades of grey which makes up the bulk of the human experience. It seems to be a natural process for the human mind to attempt to categorize things to make them better understandable–I will not attempt to deny that–but I think this can be overdone. My normal philosophical punching bag on this topic is stereotypes. I hate stereotypes. I think people can and should be judged as individuals.

I have been told in the past that I am “brutally honest.” I do not know if I agree with that, but I aim to be honest and straight forward. No time in life for playing games with people or being passive-aggressive. To that end, I can come off as arrogant and a know-it-all. I always have an answer and I am frustratingly right most of the time. I try to remember those can be bad things (but generally fail).

I’m a tech geek and a fantasy dork. I love technology in real life and play with it often. I love fantasy in my mindless reading and like to quietly pretend I would enjoy the life of a medieval assassin.

I typically dislike sports, but I discovered I really enjoy hockey. Not because there is fighting (there is not as much as you think). Not because it is brutal (it is not as brutal as you think it is). I enjoy hockey because it is: fast, highly skilled, and the true embodiment of a team effort. And, yeah, there is fighting and it is brutal.

I work, and work hard, but there is more to life than work. I play hockey. I have performed in a regular-running “Whose line is it anyways?” style improv show. I have a blog that I have been writing on for longer than some people have used the internet. I have owned my own business. I read more books on philosophy and religion than is probably healthy.

I find that the best way to approach life is a combination of humor, honesty, passion, just-enough-cynicism, and a level of intellectual analysis that would cause a psychologist to blush.

Are you ready to think?

Well, before I do that, let me take a moment to explain. I think it has been a while.

I am not the type of person who gets the typical holiday blues (well, typical for those who get it). Honestly, I couldn’t quite tell you what the “typical” holiday blues are, but I imagine they have something to do with a lot of alcohol, shouting obscenities late at night, a black eye, and probably some jail time. My assumption is that a lot of people are really just unhappy and the holidays just give them that extra nudge over the precipice.

For me, the “holidays” represent a lot of things that I do not really like about people and society. I mean, really, are you telling me that we have to take a moment each year and say “Hey, maybe you should be nice?” Joy to the world and all that sham. I guess it’s much easier to be amenable to sitting next to the fire and not fighting when it is freezing outside. The point is that there are many supposed ideals which are highlighted at this time that I believe if people took truly to heart would be things that they believed in, well, all the time. I do not think there is necessarily anything wrong with taking a moment to highlight certain things to get people thinking about them, but I really feel a lot of the marketed holidays are just shams.

Maybe it’s the consumerism associated with them. The gift giving just makes me sick. It is not that I am against giving gifts. I love giving gifts. The issue for me is being told / expected to give gifts. I can no longer count the number of times that throughout the year, I have given someone a gift because I genuinely wanted to (“Hey, you did something to remind me what a great friend you are and I wanted to say thanks”, “Hey, I found [X] which I though you would really like and here it is!”, etc.) but failed to do so at an alloted time and had an eye of ire turned on me. Not cool.

I was talking with a friend about this who noted that some people feel uncomfortable with getting gifts at unexpected times–it is easier to give them at expected times because people understand how to deal with it. I guess. The problem, in my mind, is that this highlights a bigger problem with our society at large. One of the things also discussed in our conversation is that people also feel the need to reciprocate, especially for unexpected gifts. I do not know if I agree with that, but if it is the case, I think with time individual people can learn to deal with individual gifts. Especially if you make it clear that there is not an expectation of return. But, in my mind, you can generally point to something and say “Hey, THAT’s why I am giving you the gift. Don’t give me anything back. DEAL.” If they truly feel like they have to give you something back then, well, be thankful as well.

Yet, another area where I find general fault with the slice of humanity I interact with (whether in person, in writing, or in observation) is the ideas of optimism and pessimism. I like to think of myself as a realist–I try my best to think of things as not the best or worst case scenarios. I, like anyone, cannot be perfect in this (but, perfection is just another black/white extreme, in my opinion). However, I am amazingly confronted by people who will label an action or a thought of mine as “optimistic” or “pessimistic” because it does not fit with a particular outcome or the personal view of the other person.

For example, if someone has a better expectation for the outcome of a situation and I take a moment to think about alternative outcomes, I have been told that I should not be pessimistic. Often, I get really taken back because I do not feel like I am being pessimistic, I am just trying to make sure I have a realistic expectation. When I sit down to think more about, I can generally think of ways that I could be truly pessimistic. This happens the other way too (“Oh, you’re just an optimist”). If I were to believe what people say in these situations, I would have to assume I am either manic-depressive or absolutely insane. I do not believe I am either of those things, so I assume there are other answers.

Let’s take a closer look at the ideas of optimism and pessimism. As technical terms, these words have some very specific meanings which in the usage in common vernacular seems to have oversimplified. In the study of religion, a religion or group which is identified as pessimistic does not believe that life is kind of crappy and people are pretty mean. It means that the religion identifies the world as a truly evil place, where the hearts of men are black by nature, and only by the intervention of a divine being–perhaps even the physical destruction of the world and people–can redemption can be had. You can assume something as similarly opposite for optimism.

Psychologically, this term also has a technical meaning–a pessimist is a person who truly believes in the worst. When one meets a true pessimist, one knows. These people are truly draining and truly unable to deal with the world–and truly rare. But I guess it is easier to say that someone who is depressed or generally surly is a “pessimist.”

What I am trying to figure out is if these are appropriate in relation to specific situations? Can someone be pessimistic about, say, their relationship but be optimistic, say, about their job? It seems like an easy thing to do right? Someone does not see something in the brightest of lights and so you say “Hey, don’t be such an pessimist!” Here is my problem, though. I think at some level, pessimism (or optimism) does have a meaning to people and it can influence how one interprets actions or situations. I think there is a difference between being “negative” and being a “pessimist.”

Moreover, I think there is a difference between those and beings realistic. “This might not work” (realism) is different than “this won’t work” (negative) is different than “this can never work” (pessimism). I worry that when “this might not work” is heard as “this can never work” because the listener equates anything which can be interpreted as negative with pessimism.

Even though I’ve studied it quite a bit, I have never understood why people argue that morals cannot be exclusive from a god / religion / whatever. The same-old “atheists have no morals” rhetoric.

Perhaps it is because those who express these feelings cannot control themselves?

I have to admit that the idea of people who cannot control themselves or urges being a part of something that gives enough structure to control those urges has great appeal to me… because hopefully those urges will be controlled. But I really feel that it needs to be something: a) substantative and b) not as bad or worse than the “urge.”

Also, one of the biggest problems is that the people who DO successful commit to something which makes their lives better or “beats the urge,” then often they try to push this on other people and/or when faces with an argument against the belief, they react poorly or violently. This is because the belief is more important in it’s ability to defeat the urge than in and of itself.

Take, for example, religion as the belief in this role. I’ve had great conversations with people who do not share the same religious beliefs as myself. Take, as another example, my doctor. My doctor is a very devout Christian and we have had very good discussions about religion. I don’t trust my life any less to him (…i hope) and we can have a very rational, friendly dialogue. But this is not always the case.

It is my theory that one of the greatest things in the way of pluralistic dialogue is the fact that many individuals belief is not based on the belief, in and of itself, but other factors, such as the belief acting as an agent against an urge or that “this is what the family believes so it’s what I believe.” The biggest problem with this is that when faced with challenges to the belief, even in casual dialogue, it’s hard for an individual to face disparate arguments.

It’s important to understand this. There are some people who you can be frank and open with, some you need to be more careful in how things are worded, and some who conversation may simply not be possible

http://www.kctv5.com/news/14034556/detail.html

A small bookstore in Kansas City burned thousands of books. The primary reason for this seems to be that they simply have too many books and people will not take them. However, the owner has been quoted as saying the wants to talk about the declining in reading.

“We hope to spark a conversation about the importance of books in the
face of a marked shrinking in reading trends, and staggering waste
streams of actual books,” said Prospero’s Books owner, Tom Wayne.

I have to admit that I am torn on the idea of declining readership. I will not argue that people are reading less and that this is being supplanted by other forms of media (video, music, TV, etc). What I am not convinced of is that the internet and technology is part of that. If you want to talk about how the children don’t know a good story because they only have enough attention to watch an ad on TV, I’m with ya. Do not even get me started on the quality of a lot of the media out there. But looking all the forms of media (if you were include books in this category), I just think there are more forms of literary competition for books (take for example, a complete shot in the dark, blogs and blog readership).

I’m a old-fashioned reader in these enlightened days. I like to take a good book and a warm drink and snuggle up until I fall asleep. Hell, I have a reading chair. I cannot soak my stories in over the dull refresh rate of a monitor (much to the anger of my wife when she’s trying to get me to read a story she’s written). But I am not going to be so dense as to suggest that it’s not possible or worthwhile to get quality online or in digital form. I know many people who do their reading online and, well, more power to them.

Another important fact is that, in whatever form you are talking about, there is a lot.. a LOT.. of crap. And there are a lot of crap books. Whether we’re talking about the latest serial romance novel (Does my bias on things ever show through?) or the latest “how to feed your employees cheese and make money!” book. So just because I’m not reading your crap book does not mean I’m not reading.

I just have a hard time believing that we are in the dark days of literacy. I find it more likely that things are general the same as they’ve been. The intellectual elite read. Those who are interested read. The “masses,” in whatever their form, find easy and simple ways to be entertained, which may or may not involve reading. Some people just do not want to read.

I’m not going to say which class I fall into, but suffice to say I’ve a story about an assassin and his pet dragon calling my name.

Technorati Tags: books internet reading